“Watch with Me.” Matthew 26:40
…with no private point of view of your own at all, but watch entirely with Me. In the early stages we do not watch with Jesus, we watch for Him. We do not watch with Him through the revelation of the Bible, in the circumstances of our lives…We do not know how to watch with Him; we are only used to the idea of Jesus watching with us…*
I am constantly taking in others’ revelations and realizations and epiphanies. I admire and am in awe of the way she sees God in this or she sees God in that person. I love the way some can make poetry out of pencils and paper and instagrams. I read these pieces of “glimpses of God” and I long for such perspective. I want to be so in love – entranced – consumed with my Savior that I notice the breaths, the giggles, the sound of the wind. I want to be able to walk in the midst of a crowd and still feel completely alone with Christ. I want to have noise all around and still hear His whisper. I want to have piles of this and spills of that all over and still see His beauty. I want to know sorrow and pain in its entirety and still know peace and comfort and faithfulness, unwavering! I want to watch with Jesus! I want to see Him and commune with Him in the dailies and in the once in a lifetimes. I don’t want to keep pulling Jesus “down here” and say “See, I told you!” “Do You see what’s going on?” I want to climb up in His arms for a change, as He says to me, “See, I told you!” “Do you see what’s going on?”
I need ears to hear, eyes to see, and faith to stand.
Everyday, I must ask for these faculties. They are supernatural, and they will not come from this natural woman.
I have selective hearing; I need the attentiveness of Samuel.
I have limited vision; I need the view of Elisha.
I have a shaky faith; I need the resolve of Abraham.
17 Elijah was as human as we are, and yet when he prayed earnestly that no rain would fall, none fell for three and a half years! James 5
“Ye shall receive power after the Holy Ghost is come upon you,” and this meant that they (the disciples) learned to watch with Him all the rest of their lives.*
*Oswald Chambers My Utmost for His Highest
I want to be a watchman, like Ezekiel. I want to be on the alert, ready to see God at every moment. When I wake at midnight – be on the night watch. When I wake at 4:30 am – be on the early morning watch. When I wake again at 5 am – be on the watch for His glory to rise. When I walk into the kitchen at 7 am, watch with my hands as I prepare. When I teach and train throughout the day, remain watchful of His teaching and training. When the moment is quiet, watch for His presence. When the time is tasking, watch for His steadiness. When the afternoon comes, watch how He comes after me with grace. When the evening meal is being shared, watch how He shares. When the day closes and children are prayed with and tucked, watch how His kindness and gentleness give us rest. When I lay my head down to sleep, watch how He blesses His children to sleep; listen to His song. And for every day hence, for the rest of my life, I want to watch every moment with Him. Up in His arms, high above the shaded area that keeps me from truly seeing. Just like when Nathan held Hannah high on Saturday so she could see the hot air balloons over the tops of heads and camera lenses.